Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Groaning


The ancient scriptural image of creation groaning in  an act of giving birth is particularly relevant in our situation.

  Frustration,  hurt, isolation , physical suffering , struggling ;  our whole life , sometimes  feels as if it is groaning continuously, whether spoken or unspoken.

At the same time, those  who enter into suffering, those who break open a pathway through ,are able to do so because Christ has been there before us and holds us all, in the totality of His suffering, on the cross,  that we might complete his work of redemption, through sharing in the redemptive mystery. 

In this we  endure and  ultimately shine Gods light in the world.

Suffering leads us time and time again through a process of birth to  rebirth, to being born again, to   turn around  and ultimately to  find some form of healing, whether spiritual, emotional or physical.

 Healing in our life always takes us by surprise, but is continually happening in a cycle of darkness and light, of struggling and growth, of hopelessness then hope. Even within the suffering we find joy in each other and immeasurable happiness.

Even though we are isolated, yet we reach out as others do to us, in a powerful  bond of sharing and solidarity.

This then is the fruit of groaning with creation ,as opposed to  groaning against it.

This Lent may we all find light and hope   and strength with our burdens of suffering. May they be transformed and healed  through Gods blessing and the blessing of friendship. Amen.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Tenderness


Tenderness is at the heart of survival in the situation  that we find ourselves in.

We  call this need for tenderness in caring for someone with Severe ME ' the moment approach :  Maximizing Opportunity   to Meet   Need Tenderly : the  tenderness  we talk about,  within the context of unspeakable pain, irritability, hypersensitivity  ,struggle is ultimately  the tenderness  and vision  of a child  , trusting that all will be well , trusting in growth, trusting in love, trusting in goodness, trusting in God the Father ,who holds us all,  in the whole of creation, in an ongoing  act of renewal.  

Each moment is an opportunity to regard each other  in tenderness , despite our suffering. 

Each moment is an opportunity for a sacred, healing, moment of  connection. 

Let us not forget that God holds us tenderly too.  And our little story  is part of the universe  and all then,  is safely held, in the power of the cross and the Heart of love : the power of the awesome Mighty Trinity, so  that as Julian of Norwich reminds us  " All will be well  and  all will be well and all manner of things will be well " , even if we do not know how this will be.

Let us all then seek tenderness, openness of relationship, kindness, goodness, gentleness, love and respect in our relationships with ourselves, each other and God. 

Amen.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Searching

Today has been a day when the weight of the ME is utterly immense , overwhelming and pressing us down. So that every moment is a struggle. 

On days like  this, we search for a way through moment by moment. In  this situation  it is tempting  to fall into anger because not enough is being done. The danger is the anger can eat you up or you can fall into blaming, or into despair or worse, into apathy.

The reality of severe ME is that you cannot avoid suffering. You cannot  just try and go round it or leap over it. You have to enter  into it and live  through it , because the  physical suffering is endless and  never leaves us.

 All we can do is search for meaning, is pray for better moments, is hope in goodness, is  seek a higher path, is remain vigilant to avoid despair and trust in the miraculous, which flows from the Heart of Love.

This is what we daily search for;  this is what helps us through each struggling moment. 

For Love is greater than all suffering and is a blessing opening to us all and freely available for us to receive, in any moment, so that hope can be restored and mercy touch our lives.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Bewildering


It has been a bewildering day trying to work out how to do something complicated, something new, something that does not seem possible. 

What helped was being truly seen, with compassion, helped to stand back and take some space to reflect so that new ideas could flow and a possible way forward emerge . 

It is only a tiny thing, in the scheme of things, but it was very distressing to feel so blocked and helpless and this can begin to feel huge and overwhelming. 

Truly the greatest spiritual gift,  as taught down the ages , the summit of  all gifts is compassion: the ability to enter into another person's reality with openness ,  understanding and creativity, with a willingness to love.

It seems that when things are bewildering we need to  look with a wider view, with a different perspective, with openness to grow or change. 

God helps lift us into a clearer space where with spiritual eyes we can view ourselves and others differently and seek and find new ways forward that perhaps were not seen, or visible or possible without spiritual clarity and a compassion that embraces both ourselves and each other. 

Praise God for His Spirit that brings us the gift of wisdom and helps us when we are bewildered.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Holding


We seem to spend a lot of our life just holding on. Today for example, we have been battered by noise yet again, which only someone with severe ME and  noise sensitivity would really  understand how terrible that is.


 We have been shocked and hurt by misunderstanding and misinterpretation,  from someone who should know better, and in so many ways we realise there is no easy or unrestricted  clear pathway to follow. 


Everything we achieve feels like walking through treacle, with the effort it requires to  follow through and try to get somewhere.

All of this  means  holding on to paradox, contradiction, and our own complexity. It would be nice to think that following Jesus is always about being lifted up above all the struggle,  in some holy place, but reality is messy, not least dealing with our own emotions, fears, angers, hurts, frustrations. 


Somehow we have to hold all this together within the greater mystery of love and faith. Maybe this is why the times when we have had to hold on most intensely, when all seemed lost, have been the prelude to the most wonderful, joyful , breakthroughs.

Holding on is essential , then,  if we are to remain True , to remain hopeful, to remain safe.

We hold on to love in the very depth of our being. We seek love, where love seems not, we ask for blessings, we ask for guidance, we ask for wisdom to help us through.

Sometimes we feel held by God, other times  we do not feel his presence , yet always the true reality is that he is with us and he is  still holding us.


 When Jesus cried out on the cross in the depth of  suffering and agony,  it seems he could not feel God with him either, yet truly he was held in the power   of Love and though he went through untold horrors, yet still he came through and all the time holding us in the Heart of Love, that we too might be saved.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Hope

Today we are struggling to find hope. Hope seems elusive.  How quickly things can shift. If we place our trust or build our foundation upon emotions , upon other people, upon systems and structures, upon expectations, we will always be disappointed and this disappointment  can so easily lead to despair if we are not vigilant and understand ourselves and our circumstances.

So how can we find hope in the midst of struggles and suffering? How can we find hope in bitter disappointment? How  can we keep finding hope every day , living with ME and all the injustice that goes with it?


We must turn our inner eyes to God. We must seek the goodness that is present and possible . We must look with eyes of hope toward the future. We must embrace  above all the stillness and the Truth of our being, which like the daffodils just opening are alive with mystery, light and life.


Hope, it seems,  then ,is not of the head, but of the heart. Is it not about knowledge, it is  about goodness and faith.  Hope is of the Spirit. It is moving , constantly blessing and lifting us always above our present reality, so that we will always prevail This is why we need to open our inner eyes and lift them higher than material things that trouble us , to feel the presence of hope within us.

This is what Christ came to teach. He did not come to teach us dogma and rules , rather he was more concerned with feeding the poor, setting people free, bringing goodness in to peoples lives, but above all he taught us to see with new eyes - and with new eyes, we realise, that we  may never know  exactly what hope is, but with humility we  can live in the mystery and the blessing  of hope and in  so doing , we do not despair.

Let us ask then to constantly remember hope. Let us always keep our inner eyes on God, who keeps us safe  and brings  us the gift of hope each day. Amen.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Peace


We have discovered a great truth, the naked vulnerable self is at peace, for it is the true self. The true self does not think, it knows, it does not try, it just is , pure expression, does not rush, because it is already here.  

This we have discovered through openness, daring, seeking, finding and this ultimately is liberating and incredibly empowering.

Peace comes from presence. Peace comes through awareness. Peace is tangible when we notice it, here with us.

On our journey  through life,  peace is a tremendous blessing. As we sit still and light a candle and enter more fully into the presence of God with us, may we find His Peace and our peace at one,  transfiguring the moment and ultimately healing us innerly.

May we all become aware of our true selves this Lent,

Let Peace be your guide . Amen.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Lost


Ash Wednesday




We get lost to the extent that we live our life trying to puff up our fragile ego through momentary recognition, affirmation, power, fame, status. 

We get lost to the  extent that our pain, suffering and grief overwhelm us,  so that we cannot see clearly . We get lost to the extent that we expect the world to meet our needs. 

We get lost to the extent that we expect other people to meet our needs.  

We get lost to the extent that we give  our power away to anyone else.

 We get lost to the extent that we do  not live simply in the precious moment.

Let us not forget that this  moment is an opportunity to connect with the ever sparkling God who lives with us and shines through us , if we let him.

This Lent, let us keep our focus on the Lord,  so that we do not feel lost or abandoned. His Spirit is with us and brings us the gifts we need to live a true life in the present. This is His gift to us.

 Let us say thanks and accept His gift of love and presence with us, so that we no longer feel lost or alone , so that we can journey safely through Lent and beyond, held in the knowledge of  His Love .Amen.